Helllllllllo World :)
Today I officially enter the Blogosphere as a Blogger. For the last few years I have been content to surf the web, reading many blogs and frequenting a few on a fairly regular basis.
I am constantly amazed at the sheer abundance of inspiration and talent that one can access via the web. I peer in on the happenings of many fine 'Artists of Life', and I am in awe of the pure generosity of people who allow others to sate their voyeuristic appetites by sharing different aspects of their lives, good, bad, happy, sad, uplifting or starkly confronting. I think it is very brave and, up until now, I have not been brave enough to open myself up to critiques (either positive OR negative LOL).
I am no longer content to sit back and watch the world pass me by without 'adding my two cents worth'! I've come to the realization that whilst for some it is a way to order their thoughts for no particular audience or purpose, for others it is a way of documenting their lives, a way to give their thoughts a voice. A way to be heard.
How did I get here?
Apparently I've been here before (I don't mean in an 'other worldly' kinda way!)
I mean, apparently I started to get a blog happening ages ago but my anal retentive tendencies stepped in and my fear of failure (my BIGGEST weakness) kicked my blogging aspirations to the curbside for a while!
The first hurdle was a title for my blog. I wanted something catchy, witty, thought provoking!!!! However 'IT' never really came to me. So Blogging was shelved for an indeterminable period. Then the other night I had an epiphany and 'Smashing Cups' was born.
Today as I ventured into the 'setting up stage', I was pleasantly surprised to find that some of the hard work had been done FOR me, BY me at sometime in the past! I entered my email address and the blog name and voila!!! I already had a profile, with picture, and an 'under construction' sign gathering dust on my profile page.
Thank you Self :) What a pleasant surprise!
So, I here you ask, what epiphany launched me into the Blogosphere?
A hint can be found in the title of my blog! 'Smashing Cups'!
It is a bit of a joke around our house. Me v's Cups = Disaster!
Innocent glassware and crockery fear me! When I go shopping for new cups and glassware, my dear husband steers me towards the plastic-ware! He tries very VERY hard to convince me that some plastic-ware 'actually looks like the real thing Jewelz'! Though try as he might, it doesn't quite cut it for me! I need the real thing. Even though I just know I'm setting myself up for potential heart ache. I truly am ever so slightly saddened when yet another beautiful vessel meets it's untimely end. I consider gluing it back together however the perfectionist in me just knows I will never EVER embrace the cup or glass in quite the same way again. So I apologize to the vessel, as I ceremoniously scatter it's broken body into my rubbish bin. I thank it for it's service and the pleasure it brought me by holding my morning cup of 'up and go', my coffee!
The other night I had a mini meltdown of sorts. I was sipping a cup of milo, directing my two eldest children (((aghrrrr teenagers))))) who were moping about in the kitchen. Moping because after 5 weeks of school holidays they have developed a stronger than usual 'Why Should I' attitude.
Me asking them to 'pull their weight' around the house is met with resistance at the best of times but of late they have turned into Aliens with Attitude!
I found myself battering myself upside the head, yet again with the same old argument. I swear they bait me into.
'BUT MUUUUUUUUUUUUM, your idea and our idea of tidy are two different things!'
~No argument from me there!
'Oh Gaaaaawd MUM, you want everything perrrrrrfect!'
~Yes my lovelies, however what I want and what I get are two completely different things!
.......you get the drift don't you? At this point Missy J steps it up a few notches. She starts on her own little lecture about how I want things perfect but that I myself am not perfect! It's just about here that I felt something stretch to breaking point! I could feel the tension building like a taut elastic band but I was helpless to prevent what happened next. I jumped up and screamed an almost guttural scream, and in what seemed like an almost out of body experience, I set my sights on a target (a kitchen cupboard NOT the ungrateful spawn's head!) and I pelted my precious cup at the target! The explosive sound it made as it hit it's target was strangely comforting.
Then it hit me like the cup hitting the wall, that events can occur in your life that drive you absolutely nuts, however if the same event were to occur and you had some semblance of control over it, the event can be strangely comforting and empowering. It is the lack of control that disenfranchises us!!! (I thought the word was disempowering~however the spell check disagrees with me LOL).
Normally I have to sweep up the tiny little pieces that are left after I've smashed a cup by accident! I am full of guilt and remorse and inevitably end up missing a tiny bit of that cup. Often that tiny tiny shard gets lodged painfully in my foot (my foot, no-one else's, just mine), sometimes it happens long after the event, reminding me of my mistake, taunting me with my imperfections, allowing guilt to revisit me!
However taking control reduced the fall out and minimized the guilt! This is what smashing the cup purposefully, taught me. The cup did not smash into thousands of tiny hard to find pieces. It broke into two very clean and neat pieces. With empowerment came control.
Smashing cups became almost therapeutic......and in a quiet moment reflecting on the fact that I had actually thrown a cup, 'Smashing Cups' was born!
So, with that little analogy shared I welcome you to my blog. I hope you will return, comment when you feel the need or just drink and take your fill as necessary. However be warned this blog should come with a disclaimer.........enter only if you can dodge flying cups! Because I think I shall smash a few more cups before my time on this earth is done.
Sometimes I will smash them accidently, other times I will gleefully hurl them at a wall just to remind myself that there are times I AM in control.